Where the hampster wheel always turns

About Me

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Middle aged underweight high school graduate
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"It is not advisable James to venture unsolicited opinions. You should spare yourself the embarrassing discovery of their exact value to your listener." - Francisco d'Anconia, Atlas Shrugged
"The soundest way to raise revenues in the long run is to cut taxes now." - John F. Kennedy
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My name has been the source of consternation for other people my whole life. I eventually deadened to the humiliation of the first day of school roll taking. It ALWAYS went like this: Susan, Fred, Tammy, Joseph, uh, um, A...A....A.... - "Yes, that's me!" I would call out. My odd name has provided years of entertainment as people have wrangled all sorts of bizarre pronunciations from the six tiny letters that configure my moniker.

Ash-e-lyzz, Abertha, Aiyslee. And my favorite, a typed letter from my insurance company that read: Sdr;om. I did spend the time to figure out that the rocket scientist who typed the letter had shifted to the right, and would have typed it correctly had their fingers felt for the little placement dots on F and J.

I get that it's a unique name, and that people have trouble with new things, but still. I once dated a young man, rather seriously for over a year. Upon meeting his mother for the first time she exhaled mightily, heavily sighing out in relief "Oh, I thought you were black!" Yeah, sorry to disappoint you.

As I have aged, the uniqueness has been trumped by celebrities and civilians alike. I mean, really, Blanket? Dweezil? My neighbor named her daughter "Story". There are all sorts of creative people out there.

So, imagine my flattery when I learn that one of the young tikes I babysat as a teen named her child after me. Not just liked my name and used it, but actually told my mother that she named her baby after me. Imagine the swelled head I'm getting from this news. I mean, After? Wow. I didn't think I was a particularly good babysitter - but I guess I left a powerful adolescent impression on my young charge.

I'll have to make sure I set a good example for this little one. There are a lot of important lessons I should share. While I know it's still early, I have all sorts of life tips like how to put on make-up, dating advice, how to choose a fantastic husband.. things that really matter.

I decide to look through the birth announcements so I can see the details on little Aselin. There were a lot of babies born in my little hometown the same week, and the paper is full of these little darlings - all with unique names:


• Lilah Dean Jones was born to Thomas III and Andrea.

• Colt Bryan Smith was born to Cullen and Danielle.

• Dresden Michael Sanchez was born to Michael and Tana.

• Maeve Marguerite Taylor was born to Tyler and Jamie.

• Maximilian Alexander White was born to Michael and Claudia.

• Aselin James Ray was born to Douglas and Julie.


Gff - choke -gag... Aselin James? What the heck?

What kind of impression did I leave on this girl? I may have to re-think some of my advice.

2 responses to "Confusion"

  1. hehehehe! I feel ya on the name thing. Do you know that adults ALWAYS make some "smart" comment about my name. Do you have a sister Ginger? Were your parents hippies? No, your REEEEEAL name. It gets old.

    Cimblog (tm)

  2. Recently in a class I subbed in we read a short story about having your name changed. We discussed the importance of a name and I asked the students about their names. Several had very unique names that absolutely couldn't be pronounced. I was surprised by their answers and offered some advice from an old substitue - if you want your own children to have unique names at least spell them so they can be pronouced and if you name your child Michael then don't spell it Mychael!

    If I had known you before I named by daughters maybe I would have named one of them after you and then again maybe I wouldn't have - James.

    bdrain

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