Aselin

I was so excited to log into my e-mail tonight to see I had 33 waiting messages. I have fantastically creative friends, and saucy family who share all kinds of wisdom, information, and degenerate humor. As a Stay-At-Home-Mom (capitalization because it’s a title) I can feel a little isolated. The world wide web has done wonders for keeping me in touch with people I would never call, write or remember.

So when I perused the list of my intimates who had taken the time today to think of me I was less than impressed. Seems I’m even less important than I feared. My in-box was full of coupon offers, ways to enlarge body parts I don’t possess and offers for drugs I’ll never take.

I’m sure I receive the latter because I made the mistake once of trying to buy this fantastic medical elixir my circle just calls “The Mexican Cream” online. It’s a combination of all sorts of ‘anti’ medications my veterinarian sells me for $30 a tube. A tube consists of enough medicine to cover a quarter size area on my dog. Once while visiting Rocky Point, I discovered that in Mexico you can buy the same miracle combination for about $5 a gallon.

The Mexican Cream has been discovered to cure all sorts of ailments. Besides the prescribed canine ear infection remedy we were using it for, our collection of users discovered it cures excema, mosquito bites, poison ivy rash, acne, hives, shyness and even makes a nice vinaigrette. Problem is, it’s hard to get the Mexican Cream unless you’re in Mexico. I was having friends mule large quantities across the border for me every time they vacationed.

After a while I felt like my requests were a bit of an imposition so, like the moron I know myself to be, I started searching the web for sites to purchase the medicinal elixir. I discovered that you can’t just purchase International drugs off the internet no matter how benign the compound may be. This is why there are tunnels, false bottomed trucks, stealth airplanes, and highly paid drug runners. What isn’t prevented from happening is the solicitation to try and purchase said chemicals after looking at a Farmacia site on the web.

So now, I am not only popular with the marketing departments of Sears, Crate and Barrel, and Oriental Trading Company, but I also am interesting to Farmacia Mexicana. I love my newfound international intrigue.