Aselin

Valentines Day. The Grinch streak in me doesn't like it. The hope that somehow one's feelings can be expressed by a bunch of pink carnations, an overpriced box of chocolates and a foil-embossed card left me many, many years ago. This being said, I admit my hypocrisy and still get a little sappy on the day.

As we go into this year's Valentine celebration, it's the first year my kids haven't purchased the pre-packaged perforated classroom valentines. They're growing up. No longer is one's love to be shared willy-nilly with anyone lucky enough to be stuck in your class. At first I wondered if this was a bad thing, but the more I've thought about it, I believe it's a reflection of the fact that as they've grown up, they've developed deeper relationships in their lives. They are wonderfully generous with their love and concern for those around them. I admire this in them and try to be more like them.

These deeper relationships have a price. As I've developed those relationships my heart has expanded and I feel grateful for those I care deeply about. Yesterday was a pensive, prayer-filled day as one friend underwent brain surgery, another friend received the bad news of her son's biopsy. I sat with another friend who was recovering from a terrible accident which is ushering in some great changes in his life. I received a call from another friend struggling with great depression, and another suffering marital challenges.

As I spent time praying, trying to comfort, trying to lift their spirits, I felt wholly inadequate. My friend's challenges made my heart physically hurt for them, and I realized, for me, this is what Valentine's Day is truly about: sharing the burdens of those we love and care about deeply. It's noticing little things, celebrating, mourning, waiting, comforting, sharing - all the things that truly require the heart.

I have a lot of people I consider Valentines, but none greater than my own family. As I made my late-night rounds to tuck-in and kiss each of my children, my heart felt better. I took joy in my teenager's belly laugh that comes so easily. I smiled remembering my son's desire to sit next to me wherever I sit. My daughter's tender nature, making sure my feet are covered with a blanket or stroking my hair. My little Valentines are precious.

Entering my seventeenth year of marriage, I can't imagine my life without my daily Valentine. He is everything to me. One of the great things about our daily Valentine celebration is that it has nothing to do with candy, flowers or over-priced stuffed animals. It has everything to do with the quiet daily devotion. The service, the kindness, the tenderness, the forgiveness, the patience and the humor.

Valentine's, like any good holiday, should not be a one day thing. It's about loving the people in our lives enough to stand with them and support them all year long. Happy Valentine's Days!!!