Aselin

I've got a bad back. It was a gift from my Father and my two infant children. I remember many a time my Dad was laying on the living room floor immobilized from the pain. A couple of times he 'lived' there for a few days, amassing quite a little nest of magazines, snacks and ibuprofen. I always thought it was weird, and a little lazy.

That's what I get.

About ten years ago as I was juggling two squirmy infants, two lukewarm baby bottles and a how-to parenting book, my back suddenly seized up. One would think just freezing in space would have neutralized the pain. It was so unbelievably sharp it felt like someone had taken a rusty, hot fireplace poker and impaled me.

Dropping to my knees, an infant in each arm I formed a little baby dog pile on the floor of the entry way. Unnamed infant number three, was unable to crawl, so I just balanced her on my bicep. Unnamed infant number two was a different story. He could crawl. But not in the good way. He was so excited to have mommy playmate down on his turf and he crawled over my legs and torso eliciting squeals of pain from me he thought was funny.

Once again I was rethinking this 'having children' thing. I've seen dogs that can call 911 when their masters need help. I should have gotten a puppy. Lassie would have saved me. In contrast, my children both broke out in a wail because they weren't being held properly and then each pooped their diaper.

There, immobilized on the tile floor I was starting to panic. The phone was in the other room. I could not even roll on my side. And, the air around our baby dog-pile had gotten rank. Hubby wasn't due home for hours. This was bad.

Eventually I made it to a phone, dragging one baby in each arm, pushing slowly with both legs and I breathed through the pain. It was worse than labor. I felt like some sort of wounded marsupial with all these babies clinging to me.

Of course, hubby didn't answer the phone. We were relatively new to the area so I didn't know many people let alone have their phone numbers memorized. I kept dialing hubby over and over, to no avail. Finally, scrolling through the received call directory I just started trying numbers. The first was an air conditioning company. "Wrong number" I said. The next two didn't answer. I was getting more and more panicky.

The third number I tried I got a hit. The husband of a woman I had met at church answered the phone, no she was not home but I could have her cell phone number. Since I was still flat on the floor, I didn't' have a pen or paper and completely insecure in my ability to remember a number while suffering from blinding pain I frantically looked for something to write with.

The only thing within my reach was an M n M. In a MacGyver like moment, I bit the top off the M n M , licked it and wrote the number in wet brown candy across my arm. Hanging up on the man I quickly dialed her cell phone.

"Hello?"
"Um, Hi, I'm not sure if you remember me, I just moved here with the two babies...?
"Oh, yes, who could forget you?"
"Yeah, well, um, I was wondering if you could come peel me off my floor and change two poopie diapers?"

God bless this saintly woman because she was right there, got me in to bed, cleaned up my progeny and saved the day. Each child was snuggled into me, asleep with their head on a bicep. Handing me over to hubby she gave explicit instructions to call if we needed her. I started to laugh, which made my back seize in pain, which made me yelp - which made everyone roll their eyes. Yeah, um, we might need you to move in.

Eventually I was mobile again, with explicit instructions on lifting, carrying, reaching - you know, all the things a mother of two infants can easily give up.

Since then I've been fairly diligent about the stretching, strengthening, yoga - the list of things that will help my back remain pain-managable.

Every now and then, usually under great stress, I wake up in the morning and can't quite sit up. This morning it's pretty bad. I suppose it's my children's fault. They had to go and grow up on me. Since I haven't lifted them in a few years, I'm completely out of shape.

Still, I know, I will get to return to my now-favorite past time later this morning, on this first day of summer. When, they wake up, jump in bed with me and each of them snuggles up, their head on a bicep. It's just like old times.